• Carolyn Costrelo-Rugere

How to deal with big changes in your life

Updated: Oct 2, 2020

Change is an inevitable part of life!

The real question is, do we embrace it, or do we fight it? Regardless of the size of the situation, change can be a scary thing. The truth of the matter is that everyone has uninvited fears that show up when life-altering changes come knocking on their door. However, it seems as though some people go through them with such ease, at least that's what it looks like from the outside observer. Why is that? What are they doing different? What gives them that calm edge? What's their secret?

Flight or fight

Play along with me for a moment. Picture this. Your boss calls you into his office, and tells you how much the company values you; they offer you the dream promotion you've patiently been waiting for. However, with that promotion comes a part of the job you have dreaded your whole life, public speaking. You take the opportunity, but you are now faced with a big change. How do you deal with this change? Close your eyes for a moment, and picture yourself standing in front of a large audience giving your first public speech. You're stammering and fumbling over your own words, and giving the worst possible speech you could ever imagine. You feel embarrassed, and you never want to step foot on stage again. You now feel like you are in between a rock and a hard place. You've already taken the new promotion, but how do you deal with this challenge? You now have an insurmountable, crippling fear. Remember, you still haven't gone up on stage, this is just your thoughts. Now go back to the beginning, and think for a moment of stepping out for the first time, feeling this rush of excitement, your adrenaline running high. You are on top of the world. You've been waiting for this your whole life. You see your audience completely engaged and immersed in you and your message, because they resonate with what you say. They feel and appreciate the message you bring to them. You have just changed lives, and you don't even know it. Your audience claps and cheers you on after your speech, and you've never felt better in your life.

So you still have the same scenario, but with a much different outlook. We all create pictures in our minds and associate them with every single situation we deal with in life. The pictures we associate the challenge with will dictate our coping mechanism. This is by far one of the most crucial decisions that the elite, peak performers do. They change their pictures from flight to fight, from fear to excitement, giving them an edge than most people only dream about.

Change your pictures. Change your life.




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